"B is for Beginners..."

We all have to start somewhere...

Rumors that I am about to add a liter-class sportbike to my riding stable have spurred a desire to do the same amongst nieces and nephews in the Hopkins clan. Since we're talking about brand new or at best inexperienced riders, my mother has understandably become a bit alarmed. I'm sure her memories of me, 26 years ago, in a hospital for 7 weeks and in a cast for nearly a year, are still very vivid. And even now, she probably harbors a little fear every time she sees me leave her driveway on one of my bikes.

Since I have this public forum (a handy soapbox, if you will), I thought I would share a paragraph or two from my emails with her, by way of advice for those who are considering taking up the two-wheeled way of life.

Tell them children to start with DIRTBIKES. There's no one on the trails in 2-ton, 4-wheeled vehicles trying to run you over, and the dirt is generally forgiving. Heck, I wrapped myself around a tree yesterday and only have a few scrapes and bruises to show for it. (Of course, Danny kept on going, while I lay there pinned under my bike up against the tree. "Come back, Danny, come back..." He eventually realized I wasn't there anymore and stopped ... about 500 yards down the trail. Then he teased me about it when I caught up to him, said he was sorry he hadn't gotten a picture of me under the bike. That's okay, 5 seconds later, he wiped out in a big mud puddle. I pulled up beside him, splashing him some more, looked down at him and his bike laying there in the ooey-gooey mud, and asked him if I could borrow his camera. His response shall be edited 'cause I don't use those words around my mama. LOL.)

Nobody really needs CBR1000RR kinda power on the street. It's a race bike. It's not comfortable to ride for more than an hour or two. You can't really carry a passenger. You can't carry anything you can't fit in your pockets or a small bag on the tank. If you drop it in the garage, you're looking at $1000 in damage just in plastic and paint. It will eat tires faster than my ZZR does (less than 4,000 miles for a rear tire!). Maintenance costs a fortune if you're not doing it yourself. The low, narrow profile and small head/tail lights don't make it a safe bike. If drivers don't see my monstrous bright orange tiger coming down the road at sane speeds, they sure ain't gonna see this tiny little rocket coming down the road at hyper speeds. Experienced riders only need apply here. Someone who wants to race perhaps and doesn't even plan to use it on the street. Nuts like me that have plenty of other bikes for other purposes...

To which the general response was: "Then why is Uncle BAH getting one?" (which I actually thought I answered rather well in that email. To wit: experience, a wide selection of other bikes to ride on more sane missions, and the fact that I'm nuts). A soon-to-be nephew-in-law actually replied with the fact that he had two years riding experience, which ain't bad at all, but I've known plenty of people for whom "two years experience" equates to maybe 4,000 miles of saddle time, if they're lucky. Just scratching the surface, in other words.

My reply to my mother:

I thought everyone knew my motto: "Do as bah says and not as bah does." LOL.

Two years experience, eh? In motorcycle years (kinda like dog years only in reverse), that's a couple days. I've been riding motorcycles since I was 19 or 20 ... what is that, 26 years or so? ... and am still not the rider I want to be. I've been taken down by cars, deer, uneven railroad tracks, oil, curbs, sidewalks*, and I forget what all else -- and that's not counting all my offroad spills. You have to remain 100% focused 100% of the time, leaving behind all the work and family crap that might be bugging you at the time; there's room for nothing in your brain but riding when you're riding, otherwise someone will kill you. Around each corner there's always someone about to pull out in front of you, turn left in front of you, take your lane from you ... or there's a dog who wants to cross the street ... or a bit of sand in a turn that will take your front tire out from under you and send you sliding into a guardrail that would like to slice your leg off at the knee. You have to have an extreme amount of self control (especially with a sportbike) and know when and where you can ride fast; the difference between fast and too fast on a motorcycle is just a couple millimeters of additional rotation on that throttle. Yes, you can drive too fast in a car, but a car doesn't transition from fast to too fast in a second.

The smart way to start is to get a small standard bike (what they call a "naked bike" these days) or one of the beginner's sportbikes like a Ninja 250 or Ninja 500 -- or the new 650R that Kawasaki just came out with (not a 600 or 1000cc sportbike). Or start with a small dualsport like the XT225, DR200SE, KLX250S, or the DR-Z400, which adds the benefit of being able to ride offroad. (I wish I had STARTED offroad because while riding in the dirt you are always on the edge of control or past it, which develops all the skills you need to instinctively handle a streetbike when it's out of control. People used to tell me that riding offroad would make me a better streetbike rider, and they were absolutely correct!) All of these are inexpensive bikes, so when you drop it in the garage then drop it on the other side trying to pick it up, you won't feel so bad. They're reliable and fairly easy to maintain. They don't eat tires. Hold their value really well and are easy to resell. Get incredible gas mileage ... and so on. They're all great fun to ride without being "scary fast." Someone should ride one of these bikes for a year or two ... develop some basic skills ... learn to read traffic and drivers ... then move up.

Anyway, for whatever it's worth, there's my advice to new riders. It's certainly not original to me. Ask anyone who's logged a significant number of miles on streetbikes and their advice will be similar.

Sure, we all have to start riding somewhere ... but this is just too embarrassing!

*None of my buddies will let me forget that one.